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Kamala Harris Confirms Crack In Office Ceiling Seems Slightly Longer Today

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WASHINGTON—Insisting that there was an considerable distinction over the previous 24 hours, Vice President Kamala Harris confirmed Tuesday that the crack within the workplace ceiling appears barely longer in the present day. “It may very well be a shadow, nevertheless it actually does appear larger than yesterday,” Harris reportedly stated to herself, reclining absolutely in her workplace chair staring on the crack within the ceiling as she had been for practically an hour. “I don’t keep in mind it beginning so near the wall. Ought to I inform somebody and get upkeep in right here? Though I hate to trouble them, you simply begin to discover this stuff if you’re simply form of sitting round in right here for therefore lengthy. I’d meant to maintain checking that crack daily since I observed it final fall, however I obtained tremendous busy for a pair weeks there when that spider shaped a cobweb within the nook and I used to be ready for it to drop down far sufficient that I might swat it. I ought to actually be extra diligent. Oh darn, I believe my leg’s asleep.” At press time, Harris had reportedly cleared away a number of knicknacks from her desk and was standing on it to mark the crack’s progress throughout the ceiling with a pencil.

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